The most substantive differences between the first and latest edition are not additions but deletions: Even so committed an antifeminist as Andelin could see that revisions were necessary to make the work more palatable to modern women, despite her advice to live according to antiquated notions of femininity and family.
Over the years, the book has grown from less than 200 pages to more than 400, with most of the additional pages featuring testimonials from women whose miserable marriages were saved once they began following the book's advice. Now in its sixth edition, Fascinating Womanhood has sold more than 2 million copies. There's “abduction and rape, sometimes followed by brutality and murder,” as well as “vicious dogs, snakes, a high precipice, a deep canyon, or other dangers of nature,” and even “unreal dangers” such as “strange noises, spiders, mice and even dark shadows.” Women must also sympathize with their husbands' difficulties while never expecting sympathy in return, because a woman who reveals the truth about her emotional life risks injuring her husband's fragile pride by forcing him to see that he is not always an ideal mate. The means by which women manipulate men into loving, desiring, and protecting them are familiar: FW envisions women as weak, dependent, submissive, selfless, and in need of protection from a laundry list of dangers enumerated by Andelin. They might realize that they're being manipulated, but as long as this manipulation is perpetrated by saucy, pert, childlike women, men are okay with it.
Its central thesis asserted that the most essential gender difference is that “love is more important to a woman and admiration is more important to a man.” According to Andelin, nothing motivates men more than pride, and nothing causes them more suffering than a blow to it men's need to be admired is so overriding that they cannot endure criticism or even rational conversation-which is why she informs women that “it's better to surrender your point of view to a man than to win an argument.” Instead, men must be manipulated.
Like the bestselling how-to guides for would-be wives that followed in its wake- The Rules, The Surrendered Wife-Andelin's Fascinating Womanhood told women what they wanted, and then explained how to get it. But Fascinating Womanhood, while lesser-known than Friedan's polemic, has had its own powerful impact on notions of women and their potential. We all know how The Feminine Mystique changed the world for countless women. In The Feminine Mystique, Betty Friedan complains that “the only passion, the only pursuit, the only goal a woman is permitted is the pursuit of a man.” Meanwhile, Helen Andelin's Fascinating Womanhood urges women to embrace that primary passion, because it leads to ultimate fulfillment and complete happiness. It's actually still in print, but with over 2 million copies sold there's bound to be quite a few circulating used so you don't actually have to support it.Call it a feminist coincidence: Two books published in 1963 examine gender, sex, and marriage, but arrive at diametrically opposite conclusions. If masculinity is so strong, why does it need to be coddled? That's the biggest point I don't understand about practicing Fascinating Womanhood, but now I'm kind of rambling.Īgain, I encourage everyone read it at some point. There are a few good points, such as building a worthy character by seeing the good in others, but it is vastly outweighed by outdated, sexist views.
Weirdly enough, I know people who would probably enjoy this book in a nonironic way and agree with the importance of maintaining gender roles- likely because those individuals and the author are both Mormon (which is likely why the phrase 'Celestial Marriage' pops up periodically)Īs a woman who kills her own snakes (not really sure why that phrase was used to symbolize independent woman, but oh well), this book made me either chuckle or chuck it across the room, depending on where I was. and that sexual immorality (which includes adultery but also premarital sex and homosexuality) was the cause for the fall of nations (citing the Roman Empire, Damascus, etc.) Helen Andelin also says in a later chapter that women in the workforce are the root of most of modern society's ills- divorce, broken homes, etc. Putting the onus of being the breadwinner & doing the finances on the guy while leaving all of the homemaking & childrearing to the woman may work for some but it's definitely not the ideal that will work for everyone. Partly because some of the ideas are a little on the ridiculous side (like taking cues from how small children behave as a way to act angry or get what you want), and partly to demonstrate why we (and I say this in a general all human sense) need feminism. Despite the low rating I give it, I actually recommend everyone read this at some point.